one of the happiest days of my life!

March is ending, it's D-17 to the National Exam, and for some reason I decided to update my blog yet again. Well obviously, so much stuffs have happened since my last post but I'll get to that later. Right now, I want to share a story--probably the biggest one yet.

Um, I actually don't know where to begin with this; let's just start with a couple of questions. Have you ever wanted something so bad? Something that you wish to have, or to become, since you were just a sixth grader? Well, I do. It's no secret that I have always dreamed of working in the fashion industry--especially in New York. Every night before bed, I would close my eyes, imagining myself coming in and out of every shows in New York Fashion Week and working for huge companies like Marc Jacobs or Diane von Furstenberg or Kate Spade. Well actually back when I was twelve, I dreamed of having my own line called Rhapsody.......... but let's scratch that off for a moment.

And I mean, it's not like I am working in fashion right now. But (hopefully) I'm getting closer to that. And that's where the big news came from.

Recently, I have just been accepted to one of my dream schools in New York. WHOOO! I can't believe this is happening to me, I feel like bursting in happiness!!!!! It still feels so surreal, even now, while I'm typing down this post. If you see me right this moment, you'll probably notice the big ass grin on my face that I can't seem to wipe off since the moment I received the letter. It's just that this school is super selective with the admission process and everything, and to think that I'm one of the few lucky people to get into FIT is just........ miraculous.

Actually, I also did get accepted to Istituto Marangoni in Milan a little while before this. I too am excited for it, especially since it's the alma mater of some of the greatest world-class designers like Franco Moschino, Domenico Dolce (from Dolce & Gabbana), and Tex Saverio. And also, my parents seem to be more excited about this Milan thing rather than New York. That's probably because they're also planning on having a trip to Europe while dropping me off in Milan. Hahahaha. But I don't know..... I guess I'm just kind of freaked out with the fact that I have to learn Italian to "survive" my college years. I mean, sure, the classes are taught in English, but I will not be able to get by that easily by only being able to speak English in Italy, right?

Anyways, Milan or New York, I'm happy either way. As long as I get to pursue my dream of working in the fashion industry, I'm totally fine with which school I will go to. And I know God will help me go through with the best decision, for He has been showering me with His blessings this past month.

The fact is, I'm just so grateful with my life right now. And I'm not just talking about this whole university thing. I'm so glad that God has surrounded me with such great friends, given me a great companion for the last six months, and more importantly, I thank God so much for the two most amazing parents in the whole world!

I hope the months that come after will be just as blessed as this March. AAMIIN.

that feeling when you simply can't make up your mind

What would you do? I mean, when you're between two choices, and it's just really hard to pick which one. Maybe it's not as hard for some of you, I should just choose either one. But I'm well known among my family for being an "over-thinker" (okay, so now I'm starting to make up a word that doesn't even exist).

Anyway, yes, I do think about things a little bit too much, especially when it comes to making decisions. I just really want to make sure that I've looked at both sides thoroughly and there's nothing I've missed, so that I can make the best decision. But sometimes, because I think too much (and take a lot of time at that), eventually one of the two choices is gone. And so I will end up with one choice.

Sometimes, the choice that I'm left with is the best one, but who knows, maybe the other one is better. See what I did there? I "overthink" again. It's annoying but I can't seem to get rid of it. Not this easily, at least. And it gets even more frustrating when you have to make quick decision--like this one. I have two options and I have to make up my mind fast. I mean, I can't tell these choices to "give me time" and "wait" now, can I? Time waits for nobody. GAH.

So this is not about what you think it's about. I don't think it's even close to that. Whatever that is. I just don't want to take the liberty of pointing out every single details of my life here, even though I'm kind of doing it right now. But anyway, I have two options up for grab in my hands right now: one, is to take a leap in something that I've never done in my entire life before. two, is to stay stuck in this state of mind until God knows when.

For a second there, I'm really considering to take the second option. The safer one. I could just easily choose to live another few months/years of my life doing and having the same routines over and over again, since I'm starting to think that this state of mind I'm talking about is becoming more of a habit than anything else. But if I did, oh God, I can't even imagine what would happen to me...... I would probably be screwed, even worse than academically screwed (that was my Year 12 alter-ego talking). But then again, what if the option that I didn't choose is actually the best one?

Okay, that leaves us (or in this case, me) with option numero uno. Taking a leap. Have I done that before? No. And if I do, will I be scared? No. I will be terrified. Not that I'm exaggerating, but it really takes me quite some time to adjust myself to new surroundings. Especially the ones that I'm not familiar with--like this one. I don't know what will happen to me if I choose to jump. What if when I did, I wasn't happy? What if it turned out to be a mistake? What if I end up asdfghjklbmnasdu? I can't even imagine. This is just something really new to me. I don't even know why my past-self decided to take a chance and prepare to jump like this.

It all comes down to the main question, which options are you going to pick? The answer is still unknown. God knows when I will choose between these two stuffs. I definitely need more time to think about this over again, especially since this is pretty big. I really don't want to end up disappointing myself, let alone the people around me. But what I do know is that I have got to make up my mind quick. And by quick, I mean real soon.

Whichever decision I will eventually choose, all I know is that it all comes down to this:

.... I don't even know why I suddenly upload this picture. This post doesn't even relate to New York or my dream of going there. I'm just rambling stuffs here. So sorry for making you read this. Umm I guess the only thing left to say is, toodles!

my excuse for being MIA

Yup. You've probably guessed correctly where I'd gone to this summer. London. Actually, I didn't go there just to visit some of the touristy places and have fun. I was in summer school with my elementary school friend, Aya. It was one of the best summers I've ever had in my entire life! London was so much more breathtaking that I could have ever imagined! And the best part is, I get to meet two muy bueno Mexican friends, Axel and Christ! We went everywhere together. Two weeks was too short, and it ended way too quickly. No regrets though!

1. The famous Big Ben.

One word: gorgeous.

2. The front gate of the Buckingham Palace.

When we visited that place, I saw some of the Royal Family members! I was stoked, even though I didn't (and still don't) know their names lol

3. The night view of Piccadilly Circus.

One of the most crowded streets in London, filled with a whole bunch of entertainments on every corner of the street.

4. Plumstead!

That's where Aya and I lived with our host mom, Diana, and our other house mate, Sabrina from Argentina.

5. Axel, Aya, me, and Christ at the Trafalgar Square.

Probably my favorite place in London. It was just beautiful! The surroundings, the atmosphere, everything.

6. Our last photo (on our last day in London) with Axel and Christ in Piccadilly Circus.

It was so sad. That same night, we were already on the plane back to Jakarta :(

wednesday wishes

My very first Wednesday Wishes! Okay, here we go:

1. This pair of heels from Zara
Aren't they gorgeous? Every time I visit the store at Plaza Senayan, I've been looking at them, hoping I could just grab my size and take it to the cashier. But I guess I have to wait until it's on sale, because lately I've spent just a little bit too much money on clothes and shoes.

2. Bake red velvet cupcakes!
Since the last time I baked cupcakes, I've always wanted to bake another. Especially red velvet cupcakes. I've been searching for a good recipe and the one from this website is so mouth-watering!

3. Enjoy every moments of my high school life
All this time, I've been complaining about school because I got too many exams and assignments. Sometimes I even wished that I could just graduate as soon as possible. I'm afraid that if I focus too much on the negative side, I'd forget about the happy, memorable high school moments which aren't going to happen twice. So from now on, I've made a promise to myself to always think positively and simply face my days with a smile :)

(hopefully) this is what I'll be doing for the rest of my life

A few hours ago on Twitter, I saw that one of the trending topics was #mydreamjob. It kind of inspired me to make this blog post, since I've been planning my dream job since I was in 6th grade. Hahaha. Sometimes I wonder why I even bother striving to achieve my goal, when I could easily settle for a "safe" job. But the thought of what it would feel like when I'm finally THERE, is just too good to not take a chance on.

So, I guess by looking at these sketches below, you could easily guess what my dream job is. Or probably not since some of them are, how do I put this, awful. And yes, they have the word "AMATEUR" written all over them.

This one was made in 2007. I was in 7th grade and I was in love with color-block (and I still do!). I know, I know, this is.... (insert your own opinion)

Made in late 2008. I was in 9th grade. A slight (?) improvement. I was reading this novel called "Poseur" and the sketches there were... amazing. And in a way, it just inspired me.

Three years later, 2011. This is my latest sketch.

I hope you are not paying too much attention to the dress because honestly, I think it's not that good. And I don't want to sound cocky, but I'm quite happy with this one because I finally know how to make eight-heads figure drawing aaand I'm learning how to (properly) use watercolor! I know, this still needs a lot of improvement and I am working on it, it's just that I want to share with all of you that I have not and will never give up on achieving my dream job ;)


P.S.: The funny thing here, is that all of the sketches are colored in purple and green! Coincidence?

the amazing GCTS 2011 yearbook committee

Yes. We finally did it. We have finished the 2011 yearbook! It's been a long, tiring, yet somewhat fun and memorable journey and it's all worth it in the end. I had this warm, fuzzy feeling inside when I first saw the yearbook. Hahahaha.

Anyways, I guess what I'm trying to say here is that I'm so proud of these guys (plus the other Media Siswa & Ang XXIII) and I just want to congratulate all of us because we have done IT! CHEERS!

it's been like what, two months?

GOD I MISS THIS BLOG.
Okay, not that anyone reads this anyway. But this is one of my ways to escape from reality, because I can basically write anything I want here.

Life's been hectic this past two months. And there are just so many things I want to share. Like the fact that I just joined my first MUN Competition last April. It was surely one heck of experience I would never forget. Not just the competition--which was very political, but also some other things. HA! We'll get to that later.

Anyway, have I told you that I'm posting this in the middle of my final exam weeks? But my next exam doesn't start until next Wednesday so I might as well enjoy one day for myself. And speaking of finals, I can't believe I'm almost in the end of my high school years. I will be a freaking SENIOR in July! The down side? Well let's see; UAN, UAS, and things to prepare for university. Ready? Not really.

Gosh, what the heck am I babbling about here? On to the next post.

midnight rambling

It's past 2am right now. I was looking through some old photos of mine in my laptop. I smiled a little, laughed a bit, until I realized something. Back then, I remembered, whenever somebody asked me who I wanted to be when I grew up, I'd say a doctor. Seems like a typical thing to come out from a six year-old right? And time just somehow flew and here I am. Sixteen years old. And when people ask the same question they'd asked me before, I already have a different answer. This time, I'm 100 percent sure about it. A fashion designer.

Maybe for some people it's considered as "funny" or "irrelevant" to want to be a fashion designer. Especially in this country, where people are still thinking of their empty stomaches. Don't get me wrong, I'm not being selfish nor spoiled. What I'm trying to say is, most people living in Third World Countries (like Indonesia) just don't appreciate art and design as much as the people living in First World Countries. In my point of view, people like Indonesians, still have this mindset that if you want to make a lot of money, just be a doctor, engineer, or an accountant. And I gotta admit, starting a new line (AMEN!) in this country is not the best idea. It would be even harder for the brand to make it to fashion week around the globe.

I figured, if I want to make it a success, I gotta start my future brand some place else. A place where it is the center of everything. And that place is:



New York. The fashion capital of the world. Along with Paris and Milan, of course. Again, most people would roll their eyes and say, "Are you seriously dreaming of going to university in New York? Pffft." or "You should just choose local universities. You have to be faithful to your own country!" Really? I mean, really? What does "being faithful to one's country" has anything to do with going to university abroad? It's not like I wouldn't remember of where I come from.

There are some other comments like, "Designer? What kind of goal is that?! Just be a doctor. It's more promising. You will have lots of money." See? This is the problem. Can they really ensure those words they said? Furthermore, why do they have to be so money-oriented? I thought we're taught that life is not all about money. I know, we make a living out of it but it's still not our top priority, right? And if I did choose to become a doctor and have lots of money, can those people guarantee that my life would be happy?

Bottom line is, dear readers and passersby, never judge one's dream from the surface. And never think that one job is more "promising" than the others, because for me, it all comes down to ourselves. Are we happy doing that job? Is it something that we want to do from the bottom of our hearts? There is one quote to sum it all up:

"Choose a job that you're passionate about and I promise you, you will never be working for a day in your life anymore!"

Last Wednesday, M told me something which really surprised me. I was accompanying Petra having lunch in front of our school when she suddenly came. She just finished practicing for a competition. She ordered a drink and said the most peculiar thing. "Ri, Pet, you wouldn't believe what I'm about to tell you! It's about (insert noun). We were talking about how he never played with other guys and he told me that it's because guys our age are immature, while the girls act more politely."

Then apparently, M started asking him about asdjghfk and what he thought about it. She was about to tell us but I was just too scared to hear about it. I covered my ear and randomly blabbing about how she shouldn't tell his secret to other people. In the end, she didn't have the chance to speak about it because things got pretty distracting afterwards.

Days went by and I started to get curious. What did he really say about asdjghfk? Oh the hell with it, let's just get this over with. So I went with my guts and texted her to ask about that thing. I was pretty embarrassed because I felt like I just licked my own spit. But that feeling was suddenly replaced by xcjdwkla as soon as I read her reply.

M: Hahahahaha! Jadi, dia kan (insert verb here) sama (insert adjective here). He said asdjghfk is like, really (insert more adjectives here).

I couldn't believe he said that. And if he really did, I don't know how to feel about it. I mean, it just doesn't make sense. Metaphorically, let's put it this way. It's like, you said, "NYC is the greatest city ever!" but the moment you're there, you suddenly bail for no serious reason. I mean, I wasn't expecting more from it either. It's just that, why, of all the millions of words in this world, did he have to choose those? And he should've understood how words spread in this school. I would sooner or later found out about it. Or.... never mind.

Yeah it might seem cheesy. But it definitely makes me go asdjghfk.

all we ever do is say goodbye

Consider this another word for "goodbye" from me to you


this picture is edited and taken from here

the one time I'm really touched by a wedding

So yesterday evening, I went to my dad friend's son's wedding. It was held at Century Park Hotel, Senayan and as usual, I was freaking lazy to go. But I had to because, my mom was out of town and my brother and I had to accompany my dad. I thought it was going to be another anonymous-wedding-I-need-to-attend-to party, but it wasn't. I think it was one of the sweetest weddings I've ever attended.

Here's the story.
The groom is an employee of an international bank, where he worked as one of those customer-service-guys (I don't know his position in the company). So anyway, who would've thought that by serving customers of the bank, he'd met his soulmate? Yes, his wife, used to be one of his customers! Isn't that so cute? I think so :3 The sweeter part is the fact that their relationship kept going even though they were in different cities for one year! That's what I call love, I think.


the picture is edited and taken from here

Back to the wedding, my brother and I were instantly separated from my dad as he went to meet some of his friends. He said that he'd call me when he was finished. While we were waiting, we decided to follow the wedding procession. We heard testimonials of the newlyweds' friends and we even heard the groom sang to his bride! Awww. He said that, back when they were still dating, she used to ask him to sing that song but he denied. But he did it anyway, in front of hundreds of people, while staring and smiling at his bride. Very. Sweet. Indeed. So anyway, after that it was time to cut the wedding cake. It was huge and looked so yummy. I didn't get the cake, though. Because, well, I don't know them.

Next was the part when the bride tossed her bouquet of flowers to the audience, hoping that the one who caught it would be the next bride. I heard the emcee said, "For all the single ladies, please step forward! Or for the ladies who are already in a relationship but haven't been proposed yet." Then all of a sudden, the front of the ballroom was filled with young women who are probably the newlyweds' friends and cousins. And as the emcee did a countdown, I thought,

Someday, maybe I'll be attending one of my friends' wedding and did the same thing as those women (or maybe, you know, vice versa ;p). Now, in high school, most of us would think, "When will my crush like me back? Will I ever be in a relationship?" And in the next 10 years we'd probably think, "When will my boyfriend propose me? Will I ever get married?" The same insecure feelings that we had back then. And I think it doesn't just apply in relationship problems, that insecurity will also occur on the first day of work or the first time we're in college. We'd worry that we'd never fit in. Just like what we'd thought on the first day of our freshman year in high school.

And so, as the bride threw her bouquet full of pink and white flowers, I came to my own conclusions that, the world is like one really big and even-more-complicated high school:)

P.S. Speaking of high school, I received my report card yesterday and I've made it to Year 11 Science class! Woohooo

the dream schools... for designers, that is!

Have you ever feel like you want something really bad? Well, this one is my ambition. Going to a design school in the United States! I've been searching for design schools abroad. Looking at the requirements, costs, housing, alums, and everything else. I'm always amazed at every design schools I found, but these three have stolen my heart for sure.

Parsons The New School for Design

For me, Parsons is like the Harvard version of design school. The building was previously used for my favorite reality show, Project Runway, and it's located in New York, as in the fashion capital of USA! But the not-so-good part is the fact that this school is probably out of my reach. The full-time tuition is approximately $50000 and to enroll there is even more difficult. Not only you have to give your school transcripts and TOEFL score, you have to make a portfolio and they have this "special project" called The Parsons Challenge. The challenge is to discover something new within your surroundings and interpret it in three perspectives in any medium and write each one of them a 150 words statement. Gosh. On the plus plus plus side, the alums of Parsons are Alexander Wang, Anna Sui, Donna Karan, Nikki Hilton, Marc Jacobs, and many more. AHH this school is so damn awesome.

FIT (Fashion Institute of Technology)

This one is definitely a keeper. It's also located in New York and even better, it's in 7th Avenue--which is another word for Fashion Avenue. Another good news is that, this school is a state university so the tuition fee is way cheaper than Parsons. The full-time tuition is $12000 for international and out-of-state students. Even though it's cheaper, you can't underestimate its quality: Michael Kors is also one of the alums of this design school! Even so, this school is still hard to get into. The requirements are not as difficult as Parsons but for international students, you have to go through so many steps (much more than going into a private university) and only 40% of applicants are admitted to the school.

Academy of Art University

Made by Artists for Artists. That's their motto. I think it's pretty cool LOL. Anyways, this design school is another thumbs-up. Not only that this is a private school, the tuition-fee is $22000. And to get into this school is probably the easiest, portfolios are not mandatory (but recommended) and we only need a 2.0 GPA in our school transcript. Nevertheless, this school is still very-well known for its quality in designers. Jackpot! Well, not exactly. This school is located in San Fransisco, California. The thing is, it's not New York. There's no Bryant Park or Fashion Avenue there. It'd be more difficult to expand my experiences.

So... yeah, maybe I should really think more about which university is best for me and my interest.

Bottom line, whether it's Parsons, FIT, or AAU that I choose, I plan to enroll in one of those universities with a scholarship (partially or full, doesn't matter). I don't want to give troublesome to my parents. They've already raised me and so I want to give back by relieving one of their burdens. It's the least I can do after everything they've done to me. That's why I'm willing to work very hard to get that scholarship:)

Wish me luck!

I got too carried away. well, this one is for you

the picture is taken from here